Hot water for my tumeric black pepper coffee sachet

4th August 2021

I visited a friend's cafe last week and he said, 'Jayden. How's this.' Here's what he went on to say.

He asked two ladies who had sat down at a table what he could get them. One said, 'A latte.' The other said, 'Hot water. For two.'

The hot water lady had a Gucci bag and a chihuahua. My friend didn't tell me that, but I imagine she did.

After making and delivering the orders, he watched from the bench as the Gucci lady pulled out a sachet. She poured it into her cup of boiling water.

Then, the two women talked. And talked.

After an hour, he cleaned the empty cups and the half-ripped sachet. It read, 'Coffee Sachet with MCT oil, ginseng, turmeric, black pepper.'

'The bill, thanks,' the latte woman said.

For two drinks?

'Just come to the till to pay,' he said.

At the counter, he said, '7 dollars.'

'7 dollars!' the latte woman said. 'For a latte!'

'4 for the latte. 3 yours,' he said, nodding at the Gucci woman.

'But I brought my own,' the Gucci woman pleaded. 'You can't charge for that.'

So um sorry about that houdini

12th July 2021

Don't Insult My Hemorrhoids

26th February 2021

Getting piercings from your brother (Part 2 of 2 (bit longer than Part 1, though))

18th February 2021

Getting piercings from your brother Part 1 (of 2, I think)

10th February 2021

Make sure you break a goanna's legs

2nd February 2021

Aussie Identity

28th January 2021

Yoko Ono Did An Art

21st January 2021

Civilians, Boiling Liquid, And The Klutz

14th January 2021

Shakespeare Can't Get Published

7th January 2021

Seriously, It's Fine

29th December 2020

Drinking Don't Make You Sick

24th December 2020

Petrol Stations Are Tricking Us

17th December 2020

Bum Selfies and Guilt

10th December 2020

Deconstructed Lattes

3rd December 2020

Merry Bloody Christmas

26th November 2020

A diary entry from my trip to northern Western Australia

19th November 2020

An excerpt from my new (and first) book

11th November 2020

The Cupids of Dome

4th November 2020

Big Children, Little Adults

28th October 2020

Perth Can Be One Of The Greatest Cities In The World!

21st October 2020

My Encounter with a Publisher (Part 2)

15th October 2020

My encounter with a publisher (Part 1)

8th October 2020

Whose is this?

1st October 2020